Application to Date My Daughter

Note:  This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

Download the Word version of this document. Click Here.

1	Name: __________________________			Date of Birth: _______________________
2	Height:_______	Weight:__________			IQ:___________				GPA: ___________
3	Social Security:____________________			Drivers License: ______________________
4	Boy Scout Rank: ______________________
5	Home Address: ____________________			City: ____________				State: ___________
6	Do you have one Male and one Female parent? ________________
7	Number of years married: ______________						To each other: ______________
8	Do you own a van? _______			A truck with oversized tires? ____________
	A waterbed? _________
	Do you have an earring, nose ring, or belly button ring? ____________________
	Do you have a tattoo? __________________
	If you to any of #8.  Discontinue application and leave premises!
9	In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you? ______________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________
10	In 50 words or less, what does DON’T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you?_________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________
11	In 50 words or less, what does ABSTINENCE mean to you? ______________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________________________
12	Answer by filling in the blank, please answer freely – all answers are confidential. (That means I won’t tell anyone – ever – promise.
	A.  If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded is in the								_______________ .
	B.  If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my								_______________ .
	C.  A woman’s place is in the _______________ .
	D.  The one thing I hope this application does not ask me is								_______________ .
	E.  When I first meet a girl, the thing I notice about her first is								_______________ .
Note:  If answer E begins with T or A, discontinues and leave premises (keeping your head low and running in a serpentine fashion is advised.)
13	What do you want to be IF you grow up?					_________________________________
I sear that all information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of death, dismemberment, native American ant torture, crucifixion, electrocution, Chinese water torture, red-hot pokers, and Hillary Clintons kiss torture.
			Signature (that means sign your name moron)
Thank you for you interest.  Please allow four to six year for processing.  You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.  Please do not try to call or write.